Pressure/fingerwalking

Hi Wendy,

Not of particular help with the immediate situation which is obviously very subjective but it may help in the future. When I have any new client for reflexology and particularly if I know they have had reflexology from someone else previously, I always ask after the first few moves if they are OK with the pressure I am using and whether they would prefer it firmer or softer. It is a simple thing to do but may well alleviate any grounds for complaint in the future.

If you have not had complaints previously then I would treat this as a one-off and try not to get too upset about it.
Hopefully you will get the payment resolved soon.
Best wishes
Mike

Thanks Mike, much appreciated. I did ask the client as I do with all my clients and she did tell me I needed to be firmer but to be honest I couldnt get any firmer as her bones were creaking and I felt if I went any harder Id break something or do some damage. I suppose theres not much I can do about it. My fingers/thumbs work to a certain pressure and I cannot do much more.

Hi Wendywoo,

Sorry to hear you are upset about this lady, don't let it bother you, you can't please everyone all of the time, as much as we'd like to!

I'd like to know why she wasn't seeing her 'usual' therapist if she was so pleased with her work?

I had the pressure discussion with a friend of mine recently as we swapped reflexology treatments, (both of us have been practising over 10 years each) my pressure was considerably less than his, and during his treatment to me, I squirmed a few times as it was a little bit too painful for my taste, he said that he'd had reflex from someone else and she was brutal to him, but the effects were really significant so he'd started using greater pressure... anyway... I used my normal pressure on him, and he called me the next day to say how effective the treatment had been, even though he was expecting to feel nothing! Thankfully, we had a good laugh at it, and decided that it really isn't the amount of pressure that is used, but rather the correct procedure, and (to us) the intention of helping the client heal themselves, using reflexology as a tool.

I hope you can take this too with a pinch of salt, if you want my opinion... this lady is a client that you could do without anyway. We have all come across people that no matter what we try you just cannot please! I know myself that during body massages, I can take considerable deep tissue work on my back, but anywhere else and I start screaming! I have found it difficult in the past to find someone who will be happy to vary their techniques throughout a single treatment, but it can be done.

I would also take Moonraker's advice and ask a client throughout the treatment if the pressure is good for them, if is it not suitable and you cannot offer more, then you are always entitled to say that you will not finish the treatment, and then no charge would be paid. The client is then able to find a different therapist.

Finally, keep going, don't let this put you off doing your treatments!

Caroline x

This lady is withholding payment from me even though she had a treatment for herself AND her daughter

Hi Wendy

Always good to check pressure during a session but sounds like this woman is a chancer. Think you're better off without her.

sorry, I forgot to mention the lady is a resident at a local hotel where I have my business cards, she is currently on holiday and thats why she booked me rather than her own-

I agree Caz, I also reckon too that its surely not the pressure but the correct procedure that would ensure a successful treatment?.
I suppose I will have to just put it down to being 'one of those days', I am sure if my college reflexology trainer had seen what I was doing she would have reassured me that the way I was doing it was the correct way as like I said I have never had anyone else complain or comment about the pressure before.
xx

I'm not a reflexologist but have had 2 treatments, 1 was very gentle the other really painful and put me off got to admit so won't be running back to that therapist.

Now I'm wondering if this lady is trying it on with you and trying to get a free treatment for herself and daughter.

Please don't doubt yourself you're been a therapist for 2 years and not had any complaints before so you must be good at your job or you wouldn't have any clients.

Cis

I was taught to use a good firm pressure, but found that it could be quite uncomforable for some particularly on the first treatment.
I have also introduced to prescision relexology (thank you Tranquil Moments !) which uses a technique called "linking" and you need to apply the bearest of touchwith this technique , I have always cheked with my client about what pressure they like ( I personally love a really hard treatment but I also know that a more gentle approach is just as effective) It does sound like a scam to me, like someone was trying it on, and maybe is looking for a way to avoid payment.
Just go by your regular clients, if they are happy then you are clearly doing something right, dont let this chancer put you off xx

Hi Wendywoo,

Sound like they just want a free treatment to me. I'd be asking why she let you give them both a treatment before making the complaint. The first client must have been happy to let you continue with the second.

I hope you manage to sort the payment out

Helen

the update is that the womans husband apparently 'kicked off' about paying the bill, he ordered the hotel to comp his bill to refund the money and now my very silly husband who works in the hotel has ALSO taken the money he originally paid- BACK to the couple so they have not only had two hours of free treatments they are in credit by 70 quid!!! I am fuming! not at any time today has the hotel telephoned me to discuss this, I have been unable to get there myself as I am disabled and my hubby had the car.

I am so upset because apparently this woman spoke to the hotel manager and said that in China they are so much firmer and she was very unhappy with my 'touch', blimey, had I been any firmer I swear I would have damaged her feet and I wasnt about to be sued for breaking bones!

I am more unhappy because I trained to be a reflexologist after a bad back injury so had to find something to get me back into work that suited my own needs, I spent over two years at college studying this and Indian head massage and it wasnt easy, I had to battle with stairs, high stools, numerous obstacles yet I was adamant I wasnt going to freeload and live off benefits as a disabled person who wanted to contribute back into society. This woman has managed to make me feel like I am now useless, although I havnt had any complaints off anyone else I have treated it was clear she didnt like the look of me when I introduced myself. She took one look at me and said "oh, are YOU going to be doing it?" as if I was certainly not what she was expecting. I do not ever let my disability affect my work, why would I choose to do something I wasnt able to do??

I do feel this is personal and I have asked my husband to remove my cards and adverts from the hotel as I feel I can no longer do any work there. I am also angry that this woman had two IHM out of me and said they were ok but still she took the full amount of all four treatments back off me. I havnt been able to defend my case on any of this. As far as I am concerned what is the point? she has her money back therefore I have basically admitted liability even though I didnt have any choice in the matter. (I know a husband who will be sleeping in the spare room tonight!)

I also feel that not having a firm enough touch does NOT constitute a poor treatment and she should have asked me to stop the treatment when she clearly wasnt happy rather than let me go on to do the full 45 minutes and THEN treat her daughter!.

I now realise why so many people feel they are on the scrapheap when they have a disability and find it hard to get work

sorry for the rant...I need to go and do some deep breathing.

thanks again

Wendy woowoo
Dont let this put you off you clearly care so very much about what you do and sad to say they are people who are only too happy to take advantage. I really get the feeling you were scammed and they have done very nicely out of it thank you! I know I had a treatment not to my liking i wouldnt go back, but they had 4 treatments - so the first one must have been so awful they came back for 3 more !!!!!!!!
Take a deep breath and move on dont dwell on it, you are a competant caring therapist who has been unfortunate to meet some not very nice people!

Wendy woowoo

Surely this lady needs to take some responsibility too - why on earth sit through a whole treatment and say nothing if she wasn't happy with it? She is more than happy to kick off about not paying, so it's not as if she is shy about saying what she thinks. I also agree therefore, she is just getting out of paying.

I had a session one time with one of my course tutors, who used not just firm pressure but brute force, and it was so unpleasant and painful and my toes all cramped up - I had to tell him to stop. Stimulating someone's feet as HARD as you physically can, is not always best, and can sometimes be quite detrimental!

I do wonder though whether the lady in question is used to more of a Rwo Shur type treatment?

Wendywoo,

Please keep your chin up, unfortunately you have been trodden on, not all people out there are out to ruin the reputation of good therapists. This woman was clearly out to scam you, hindsight is a wonderful thing.

Don't let this stop you doing what you do, and do not dwell on it. Take is as a learning experience and move on.

Best wishes, Caroline x

Hi WW

Sorry to read about your troubles.

Unfortunately reflexology/massage in Asia is far firmer than in the west, and the knuckle/tool techniques are used to apply more pressure. I think this is definitely a cultural problem (vice versa same happens to westerners who can't handle oriental pressures in Asia). Shame you wasn't paid, but this shouldn't put you off. If you have had lots of really good clients at this hotel, why give up. You will always meet ah* in life, as that is life.

Best Wishes

RP

Hi, I agree with Reiki Pixie,
I did mini reflex treatments at an open day and one of the clients happened to be chinese. She absolutely loved it, but said that it was so completely different to what she had experienced at home, as they used very firm pressure to the point of it actually hurting and that it was certainly not a relaxing experience for her. Please don't take this experience personally ( I know easier said than done), these people may have had an agenda and then again they may have expected something completely different. Take the experience and learn from it:
1. Communicate with the client - which I am sure you do anyway:)
2. You can't please all of the people all of the time
3. Believe in yourself, and please don't let this knock your confidence, Onwards and
Upwards as they say:)

Aroma Amethyst xx

Hi Wendy
Not a lot more to add. No wonder you're fuming. But please don't let one awful experience stop you.

Thanks again.
I have decided after a lot of reassurance from some good friends of mine and good old mum who is always the voice of reason that I am not giving up. Ive worked so hard for my qualifications and battled through so much to get there if I give up then they have won.

I have learnt so much from this and I have decided to give a customer satisfaction leaflet after each treatment so should this occasion arise again then I can show the customers that have been satisfied with my treatments.

I do believe this couple were out to fleece me and they check out of the hotel tomorrow, it would be interesting to see if they settle their final hotel bill without any hassle...... I doubt it! Apparently they have been sending meals back all week and complaining about everything. Why oh why is the customer always right??? if it was my hotel Id have thrown them out by now!

One thing I did wish for today to ruin the rest of their holiday and it happened...it rained!!!! mwhahahaha

sorry a bit childish but it kind of compensates slightly for the upset and lack of sleep that this woman has caused me.

thanks again everyone.

Hi Wendy,
Just wanted to add to everything everyone else has said, don't let this knock your confidence. I am a massage therapist and not very knowledgable about reflexology, but I do know that one man's meat is another man's poison... I have some clients who absolutely love my massages, and occasionally clients who I know will never come back for a second. It's a very individual thing. You had a genuine reason for not going any deeper (I have had the same thing during a massage with a lady in her 70s all skin and bone and suffering from heart disease who asked for deeper pressure, but I simply did not feel able to apply a much deeper pressure without causing damage), and as long as you were confident in your reasons she had no reason not to pay.
It's probably not a situation we come across very often - we too-polite British would almost always pay up and smile that it was lovely even if it wasn't to our taste.
I understand totally your frustration and anger, and in your shoes I think my confidence would also have plummeted, being a relatively newish practitioner.
This lady does indeed sound like a 'right piece of work' - try and forget the whole unpleasant experience, carry on with the good work you are doing, and remember that karma will get her in the end....

Much love and good thoughts,

Gaynor

PS Try not to blame the hubby too much - i know it's cause to scream out loud that they have walked away not only without paying but better off, but it was a simple mistake probably made under pressure from an unpleasant man! I'm sure he understands every bit of your frustration and hurt and is absolutely kicking himself....

Hi Wendywoo,
Glad you are not going to be put off, just remember as others have said Karma.
As they say Karma is a bitch and she slaps really hard......I heard that recently and I like the sentiment:) especially in this case.

Aroma Amethyst

Hi Wendywoo,
Glad you are not going to be put off, just remember as others have said Karma.
As they say Karma is a bitch and she slaps really hard......I heard that recently and I like the sentiment:) especially in this case.

Aroma Amethyst

HeHe Love it! so true lol

Just a quick update, Ive had two further bookings from a different client who has never had reflexology or IHM before and she LOVED it! I constantly checked with her the pressure and her comfort was ok and on the advice of another wise friend I asked her if she would kindly fill out a customer satisfaction sheet so I can keep them and show them should anyone else be unhappy.

I am compiling a report to the hotel stressing how badly I felt they dealt with the complaint and that I wish it to be filed for further reference should the need arise. I have learnt so much from this experience and have put it down to a bad experience. The couple were apparently a nuicence to the hotel and staff constantly complaining and sending food back....Id have banned them personally if I were the manager. Can do without people like that bringing the place down.

I also felt strongly that not slinging the woman around the room or bashing her feet constituted a FULL refund! (give me 5 minutes with her now though!...;) I would happily carry those tasks out!!! )

Anyway I got paid today without any hitches and now its onwards and upwards.

Thanks everyone again

xxx

Glad to hear you have had a better experience and a bit of a learning curve too, just remember - Karma !!!!!:D

Just a quick update, Ive had two further bookings from a different client who has never had reflexology or IHM before and she LOVED it! I constantly checked with her the pressure and her comfort was ok and on the advice of another wise friend I asked her if she would kindly fill out a customer satisfaction sheet so I can keep them and show them should anyone else be unhappy.

I am compiling a report to the hotel stressing how badly I felt they dealt with the complaint and that I wish it to be filed for further reference should the need arise. I have learnt so much from this experience and have put it down to a bad experience. The couple were apparently a nuicence to the hotel and staff constantly complaining and sending food back....Id have banned them personally if I were the manager. Can do without people like that bringing the place down.

I also felt strongly that not slinging the woman around the room or bashing her feet constituted a FULL refund! (give me 5 minutes with her now though!...;) I would happily carry those tasks out!!! )

Anyway I got paid today without any hitches and now its onwards and upwards.

Thanks everyone again

xxx

Hi honey, so sorry to hear you've had such a rotten experience. (If you had pressed harder, she may well have complained you did some damage(!) ) Take pride in the fact you stuck to your guns while still taking her wishes into account - that's being professional!!!

My first thought, also, was that this woman was trying to get out of paying. Ah well. It's not a good way for her to live, and will not be doing her any favours, however it must seem(!)

One thing that works for me is the old, write a furious letter you don't send, trick. Just get it all down on paper. Apparantly, through some psychic 'link' we all have, the message gets across!

All the best xx