Hello everyone, I wondered if I could get your opinions on this, please?
I'd like to start having a massage every month or so, partly to relax the muscles I use in the gym and partly for therapeutic/relaxing reasons. Basically, I just wanted to try it and incorporate it into my life.
I had one the other day at a spa but was quite disappointed by it. I asked and paid for a full body massage, which I thought would include all the main muscles. I'm very polite and well-behaved, and knew it wouldn't include certain areas, but I thought it'd include all the main muscles.
The masseuse told me to strip to my underwear and lay on the table. Already I wondered if the glutes would be done properly, but OK, it was my first massage and I just wanted it as normal as possible. The glutes were massaged, but only the higher bits, from above, and not where the muscle meets the leg muscles. The quads were included quite well, but could have been done more thoroughly (higher) without any danger of contact with the groin. Overall though, I enjoyed this section of the massage.
When I had to lay on my back, however, I was totally wrapped up/draped apart from my head, feet and wherever I was being massaged. When my left arm was being massaged, my right arm was covered etc. My pecs were only done from above and, like my glutes, only the higher bits and my abdomen/the rest of my torso was not done at all or even exposed to the air.
So, overall, I was quite disappointed. It's not that I wanted my abdomen done more than other places, I just didn't think it would be left out in a full body massage. I will ask the spa about this and see whether any of the other therapists are better (as I say, I would like regular massages), but feel a bit ripped-off, frankly. I don't know if they will think I am a pervert asking about it, but I feel I may have been discriminated against for being male.
What do you think?
It sounds like a regular massage to me as it's taught to many therapists.
In respect of being covered up and only exposing the parts being massaged, that's usual practice to help prevent the client from getting cold or feeling exposed (some people are embarrassed about their bodies).
The abdomen is not usually a place that's massaged, though you could request it of the masseur and see if they'll do it.
I don't think you've been ripped off, I think you've received a massage to the standards of most modern massage teachings.
All Love and Reiki Hugs
Hi Greg35 welcome to the forum. 🙂
Although I do agree with Giles in so much as towel techniques are taught to help maintain the dignity of the person receiving a massage and help to keep them warm, so it is quite normal to have the areas not being worked covered with a towel. 🙂
However if you go to a masseur or masseuse who has been trained at a traditional teaching institute then they will have been taught to treat the gluteals and the abdomen as a part of their full body massage tuition.
Can I suggest that rather than seeking a massage in a spar type environment, that you look for a local massage therapist who has been trained in remedial or sports massage and see how you get on with them. 🙂
Hi Greg35 welcome to the forum. 🙂
Although I do agree with Giles in so much as towel techniques are taught to help maintain the dignity of the person receiving a massage and help to keep them warm, so it is quite normal to have the areas not being worked covered with a towel. 🙂
However if you go to a masseur or masseuse who has been trained at a traditional teaching institute then they will have been taught to treat the gluteals and the abdomen as a part of their full body massage tuition.
Can I suggest that rather than seeking a massage in a spar type environment, that you look for a local massage therapist who has been trained in remedial or sports massage and see how you get on with them. 🙂
I agree with Paul. Spa's are generally more on the pamper side, often with fixed routines. Not saying all spa therapists are pamper artists, but that's usually what that scene is about. A local therapist (often self-employed) working from home or a clinic with deep tissue, sports and remedial qualifications will more likely provide the massage you are looking for.
ISTR that some female masseurs experience problems when massaging the male client's abdominal area so may well avoid this area on purpose.
Another issue is that if you're not blessed with a rock solid 6 pack, the masseur may be sensitive to this issue and not want to touch the area of a client as it might be embarrassing for the client.
Alternatively, if you are blessed with a rock solid 6 pack, perhaps she felt she might not be able to control herself if she went near it. 😀
Hi Greg35 welcome to the forum. 🙂
Although I do agree with Giles in so much as towel techniques are taught to help maintain the dignity of the person receiving a massage and help to keep them warm, so it is quite normal to have the areas not being worked covered with a towel. 🙂
However if you go to a masseur or masseuse who has been trained at a traditional teaching institute then they will have been taught to treat the gluteals and the abdomen as a part of their full body massage tuition.
Can I suggest that rather than seeking a massage in a spar type environment, that you look for a local massage therapist who has been trained in remedial or sports massage and see how you get on with them. 🙂
Thank you, Paul. I'm glad I got a reply from you as I love the posts of yours that I've seen.
Reading these replies, I'm reassured that I received a pretty standard massage, although I'm saddened to see massage (at a spa) is a lot more inhibited than I thought. For the record, I am a regular at the spa anyway, so most of them know my face, although by chance I happened to get a therapist I had not seen before (and I don't think she had seen me either).
I honestly do not have a fixation with the abdomen, it's just that I didn't realise it was an issue, especially with people who I thought would be used to doing it for both genders. Female doctors have examined my abdomen and it never occurred to me that there was any eroticism/embarrassment linked to the area. Looking at my own stomach, I really would not expect them to go lower than the navel anyway - it bothers me more that the general "torso" was left out, like the higher abdominal muscles in front of the ribs, and the sides and lower parts of the pecs (I knew nipples would be avoided).
Another issue is that if you're not blessed with a rock solid 6 pack, the masseur may be sensitive to this issue and not want to touch the area of a client as it might be embarrassing for the client.
Alternatively, if you are blessed with a rock solid 6 pack, perhaps she felt she might not be able to control herself if she went near it. 😀
It's more of a 4-pack - likely to cause neither embarrassment to myself or excitement to anyone else. 😉
Hi Greg and welcome
All the posts above are sound. Couple of points to add:-
Spa therapists are often under time pressure with clients booked literally back to back for one hour full body massages so they tend to focus on the more popular and less controversial areas.
Some massage training these days isn't as thorough on the glutes as it used to be. There are old threads on here which debate reasons why but too many new therapists don't feel confident working the glutes which is a shame.
Some clients don't like having the abdomen worked, sometimes because they're self conscious about their bellies, sometimes it can be sensitive/painful. Massage therapists of either gender can be skittish about the stomach as very occasionally some men have an completely unexpected sexual response which can be embarrassing for both client and therapist.
It's absolutely nothing to do with attraction and an experienced therapist will know what to do (work a different area, ask the client to turn over etc) but newer therapists understandably can be a bit nervous.
Agree with others that looking for someone with deep tissue, sports or remedial qualifications should be better for you. A good therapist should kick off with a consultation to talk about any underlying health issues, what you're looking for with a massage and any parts of the body you'd like to concentrate on or avoid.
Hope that helps
Massage therapists of either gender can be skittish about the stomach as very occasionally some men have an completely unexpected sexual response which can be embarrassing for both client and therapist.
The draping was so thick and heavy, I doubt either of us would have noticed. I always thought massage involved being draped with a towel, yet this was an extremely thick, fluffy blanket that covered up the entire body apart from the head and feet. Not that it's a bad thing over the groin, but I don't think many men would want their whole bodies covered up that much.
I take on board what you and others are saying, and hopefully will find someone with sports/remedial training. However, I did think any Full Body massage would include more of the body than this. I actually measured the area I estimate wasn't massaged (top of legs to mid pecs) and it's approximately 22" - a third of the body.
Because I'm talking about muscles, it may sound like I wanted a sports massage, but I did actually want a normal, relaxing massage. I always thought the appeal of massage was that someone else's touch felt nicer than your own. However, most of my massage was flat-palmed with little-to-no thumb usage. It didn't really feel any different to me rubbing my own muscles. On a positive note, I did enjoy the "Back Tickle" (I believe it's standard to quickly tickle the back at the end of the back section?) That was lovely. If anything, I'd love to have a massage with lighter, relaxing strokes like that.
If that's the type of massage you are looking for perhaps look for Hawaiian Lomi Lomi Massage. Lots of free flowing movements and little towelling. [url]Kahuna massage - YouTube[/url]
Skills of massage therapists do vary. They is many schools of thought and many ideas of application. Not forgetting different levels of training. This is why spa's can be a problem. Often the therapists are trained to do signature treatments, 5 strokes of this, 10 strokes of that. So the treatment will be the same whoever is practising it. Some people like the certainty. Bit like McDonalds or Lidl, usually the same wherever you go.
Because massage is such a personal experience you may have to try different providers to find the massage and the therapist that resonances with you.