Hi, I suffer from depression, PTSD and dissociation...am on remeron and have just finished efexor....(as of last saturday) (efexor never really worked much, and remeron just about lets me sleep at night and that's it...I feel better during the night, at least...)
and I am really suffering with hyper-vigilance, jitteryness, lack of proximity tolerance, jumpiness ... it looks like paranoia, but isn't... its flashbacks, primarily to when I was bullied all through junior and secondary school...when a group of 20 girls would chase me and laugh at me and ridicule me and call me names and throw things at me (including once a wooden chair in a lesson...) noone ever did anything to help....
I am in psychotherapy, and it really helps, the thing about PTSD is that it gets worse before it gets better, sadly...and I suffer meltdowns in public (eg when people 'invade' my space)and am then subjected to further hatred and humiliation...when I get angry and act against my better judgement...but only to protect myself in the way I couldn't when a child and teen...
In addition, I was born 2 months premature via forceps, with no contact with my mother at all for 3 weeks.....alone.....so I started out life vulnerable and 'skinless'...
and my father was paranoid and unstable when I was growing up, and acted unpredictably and made out I was the 'insane' one not him, and he threatened to send me away, put me in a straitjacket, etc...I witnessed domestic violence between him and my mum....
the world was not a safe place...nowhere and noone was safe...and that's how I'm reacting to strangers now....(although it was 'known' people who actually 'abused' me....) and can't bear strangers to look at me...or be anywhere near me...I'm always on the alert for 'attack'..
I'm working hard at overcoming this mindset, in therapy, and could use some additional gentle flower essence containment as I go through this...
I started taking rescue remedy again....which, along with therapy seems to be helping a bit, but was wondering if an individual remedy (or combo) might be more suitable?
I just got someCherry Plum.....and have taken one 'dose'...what do people think?
thank you...
RE: bach remedy for hyper-vigilance/PTSD?
flashbacks, primarily to when I was bullied all through junior and secondary school...when a group of 20 girls would chase me and laugh at me and ridicule me and call me names and throw things at me (including once a wooden chair in a lesson...) noone ever did anything to help....
star of bethlehem FR would help to remove the shock of this from your system along with the shock of the forceps delivery
...when I get angry and act against my better judgement...but only to protect myself in the way I couldn't when a child and teen...
...
I witnessed domestic violence between him and my mum.... ..
I just got some Cherry Plum.....and have taken one 'dose'...what do people think
**I would encourage you to continue with cherry plum. I used it to help mothers and children when i worked in a refuge and they found it helped enormously. How about adding the star of bethlehem and also white chestnut which will help you to stop re-playing unhappy times over and over. If you make up a 30ml bottle and take a few drops 4 times daily it will last 3 weeks, then you can try a different combination***
tigress
RE: bach remedy for hyper-vigilance/PTSD?
thank you Tigress, I appreciate your thoughts.
I don't think I've tried White Chestnut, I was taking Sweet Chestnut last summer, at the recommendation of my psychotherapist.
I've also never tried Star of Bethlehem...it touches me that it has helped people in Refuges....somewhere my mother and I never had the opportunity of staying....although it was pretty rough and many times over she threatened to leave with me...always it was 'patched up' messily......over and over again....
Re shock. plenty there still....when I had cranial osteopathy (again at the recommendation of my therapist) my cranial osteopath noticed the shock, especially around my diaphragm......
if I could afford it I'd have cranial osteo again...but my c.o. also moved out of London and I am wary of trusting anyone I don't know right now, as I feel quite fragile.
will get the Star of bethlehem at least....(and maybe add the w c when next paycheque comes through....)
edit to add...I find it poignant that I would still focus on the troublesome symptoms without paying due attention to the compassion that I need...as in looking at the cp traits and not the sofb ones.....its sad, and I can now incorporate the compassion...
thanks again.
Katie
RE: bach remedy for hyper-vigilance/PTSD?
was just thinking have you tried EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) or TFT (Thought Field Therapy) I hear they are both very good for PTSD.