The Rabbit Joke

One quiet day at a small village pub, around lunch time, a rabbit hops in through the door, lollops over to the bar, jumps up on a bar stool, and says, perfectly clearly:

"I'm rather hungry. Could you please tell me what's on the lunch menu?"

The bartender is astounded, but manages to maintain his composure: "Ah... well, our house special is toasties. Any filling you like."

"Oh, lovely," replies the rabbit. "I'll have a spinach and mushroom toastie, please."

Still stunned but compliant, the bartender takes the rabbit's order to the kitchen, and within minutes, presents him with his lunch. The rabbit sits up on his haunches, picks up the toastie in his little paws, nibbles away daintily till it's all gone, thanks the bartender very much, and leaves, the astonished eyes of patrons turned towards him the whole time.

The next day, at about the same time, back comes the rabbit, and again orders and eats a spinach and mushroom toastie. And again the next day, and the next. Word spreads fast. Soon people are coming from far and wide each day to see the talking, toastie-eating rabbit, and of course, while there, order their own lunch and drinks. Business is booming, all thanks to the rabbit and his spinach and mushroom toasties.

Then one day, some weeks later, the rabbit hops up onto his stool as always and says, "The usual, please."

"Um, I'm terribly sorry," the bartender admits, "but we're completely out of both spinach and mushrooms today. How about a ham and tomato toastie instead?"

The rabbit hesitates for a moment, but then says "Oh, all right, then," and takes the ham and tomato toastie and eats it. Then, after thanking the bartender, he jumps down from the stool, hops out the door... and never comes back.

Months go past. Without the rabbit to draw the crowds, business at the pub goes down the drain. Finally, a year to the day since the rabbit's disappearance, the bartender is wiping down the bar just to give himself something to do as he looks out at the empty room, waiting in vain for even a few lunch patrons. Suddenly, over the stool where the rabbit always used to sit, he sees a faint, shimmering shape. It grows clearer and clearer until it becomes recognisable - the ghost of the rabbit.

The bartender gasps and backs against the rear wall, shaking. Finally he manages to get out: "W-what happened to you?"

"I died!" the ghost rabbit responds.

"Er, yeah," the bartender goes on, "but I mean - what from?"

And the rabbit replies...

[COLOR="Purple"]"Mixin' ma-toasties!!"

C 😉