I'm sure plenty of these have been around before, but here are a few of my favourites...
[COLOR="Red"]Q. What nationality is Santa Claus?
A. North Polish.
[COLOR="DarkGreen"]Q. What Christmas carol do sheep sing?
A. Fleece Navidad.
[COLOR="Red"]Q. What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?
A. Crisp Kringle.
[COLOR="DarkGreen"]Q. What is Good King Wenceslas's favourite pizza?
A. Deep pan, crisp and even.
Anyone got any others to share? 😉
Thanks Charis, always good to have a giggle.
The one that made me laugh was a cartoon of a pen full of turkeys beside a field of Christmas trees being cut down. One turkey looks at the trees being carted away, turns to his neighbour and says "I'm really glad I'm not a Christmas tree".
Marks And Spencers new advert states that it wouldn't be Christmas without M&S.
They're right too. It'd be Chrita.
Marks And Spencers new advert states that it wouldn't be Christmas without M&S.
They're right too. It'd be Chrita.
:rollaugh:
Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
Because he had low elf esteem
This one, like most, should be read out loud for best effect...
I knew a girl who, over Christmas, had her Russian boyfriend, whose name was Rudolph, staying with her. On Christmas morning she got out of bed, went to the window, and said "What a beautiful day! It's so sunny out there."
"No, no," her boyfriend called back, still in bed. "It's going to rain."
"What do you mean? Come and look, there's not a cloud in the sky!"
"No, no, no. Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."
Sorry - in advance!
Have you heard about Bob the brown nosed reindeer?
He's right behind Rudolph the red nosed reindeer.
He can run as fast, but can't stop as fast.
Q: Why does Santa wear pink underwear?
A: He's a man. He did all his laundry in the one load.
Christmas group therapy
[COLOR="Green"]Not exactly a joke, but a child was heard to sing....
"we wish you a merry Christmas and a happy new EAR!" 😮 😀
Happy Christmas to all HPers 🙂
Happy Christmas to all HPers 🙂
:rollaugh::rollaugh::rollaugh::rollaugh::rollaugh::rollaugh::rollaugh::rollaugh::rollaugh::rollaugh::rollaugh::rollaugh:
... and to all a good night! 😉
Hope everyone has had (or is still having) a wonderful Christmas!
Here's an insight (if somewhat stereotypical) into how we celebrate it where I come from... 😉
[url]Aussie Jingle Bells - Bucko & Champs - THE ORIGINAL - YouTube[/url]
(For those not fluent in Strine, a few translations:
Holden: popular Australian make of car
Ute: short for utility vehicle - a light truck with an open tray at the back
Esky: brand name for a cooler bin with ice packs
Kelpie: Australian breed of working dog
Thongs: Australian for flip-flops!
Swaggie: short for swagman (itinerant worker, as in the song "Waltzing Matilda")
Shoot through: leave very quickly
Oh yes, and in the ad at the end, "It's French for yoghurt" was the catchphrase at the end of all Yoplait commercials of the '80s and '90s (was it the same in the UK?).)
That was a bit of fun! We had a lovely day with family and now ready for some kip. Hope yo'all had a great day :).
All the raindeer had red noses
That was so untill rudoph did an emergency stop
And one more before the holiday season is over...
The Three Ages of Man
1. He believes in Santa Claus.
2. He doesn't believe in Santa Claus.
3. He is Santa Claus.