Just saying Hello

Good morning,
I am new to this discussion and this seems the most appropriate thread to post in for me but I do not call myself shaman.

Please let me tell you something about myself. Since a child, I saw things in a different way to others, my mother is a healer by the laying of hands. I am one of those people who can see colours around others but did not tell anyone until I was older as I thought it was normal to see this.
One of my mothers friends, a medium, told me I had a guide. He wore a buffalo hat and had a small tik-tak drum. He danced. This meant nothing to me as, being of Celtic and Russian ancestry, I had no interest in or affinity with Native Americans. I still don't but now know the soul can travel to many forms.

I see the world as a web or pond, everything that moves upon it causes reaction somewhere else. Birds fly, the bee buzzes, the rock sits, it all means something but can also just be the normal life of those things. Always studying the normal to see the pattern. Eventually I shunned this esoteric world for one of science. I loved Geology and studied the inside of the crystal world from the matrix to the mass. But it was not for me then.

When I went to university I studied Veterinary science and worked with animals for many years, holding their life, nurturing and healing but also helping their spirit leave when they had no use for their body anymore.I had a great affinity with some animals but appreciated all forms.
My path changed and I began to see the energies of plants, I left the vetererinary profession to study herbalism but something was still missing. I studied Aromatherapy/ essential oils to understand the essences of the plants I studied crystal healing and realised the geology was the form whilst this was the spirit. I began my work with the plant spirits.

One day a few years ago I went for a walk and met a yew tree. I sat beneath the yew to rest a while and asked the spirit of the tree to show me something of the other dimensions, worlds if you will. Nothing happened.

Back at home that evening, I began to feel unwell, it was in the winter, end of December. All the Gp's were closed until after the new year. I got worse and worse, was seriously ill, drifting in and out of conciousness, doctors came almost a week later and gave me stronger and stronger anti-biotics. They wanted to take me into hospital. I alsmost conceded in amoment of conciousness. Nearly 2 weeks later, after much journeying, I returned to my body fully. Which was thin and weak.

I wrote this poem

She tore me down
Broke me
Took me to the very edge of oblivion

She came to me as a small child
And told me tales of penguins
That lived in the wall

I shivered though my brow burned
And my eyes were hollow
Like a Halloween pumpkin

First my kidneys, red water
Then my lungs green, no air
All the while, shaking, drifting.

Time was only here, not where I went
Holding her hand and watching her curls
For 13 days in the depths of winter.

When I returned I could not see
This world in the same way again
Though she taught me the spaces between worlds

I wish I had not rest against her trunk
And asked her what she kept beneath
For I did not like the answer

I have a deep relationship with all trees and plants now.
I travel to meet their guides, I travel the paths and obtain knowledge. I augur the patterns in the land and sky, I live every moment like this.
My clients accept my methods of healing. Whatever I choose. But the plants are my main helpers now.

My son, who has a communication disorder, spends most of his time, 'away with the fairies'. He sees the patterns and reads the signs in everything. He 'remembers' things into his otherworlds. He sees things here and takes their essence into his worlds. Yesterday he was taking winter stones, he meditates on them and then travels to his worlds lying on a sheepskin, to place the items there. He has a rabbit and a minotaur(?). The rabbit grows large and he can ride it. He is 8. I do not indoctrinate him with anything.
Since he has been telling me of his worlds, it makes me realise I should do more journeying.

How do you find the time with the reponsibilities of now?

Sorry this post is long and also maybe in the wrong section.

Best wishes to all of you.