ok, so another topic got me to thinking about this and I thought i'd move it over here and keep it as an intellectual topic rather than personal to people's situations.
how does everyone define forgiveness? to me, forgiveness is saying "it's ok." by forgiving, you're excusing...at least that is how i think of it. for the most part, i think I am very forgiving. Everyone makes mistakes and I want to be forgiven. As long as I thnk the person is sincere, then I'll forgive pretty easily. It's amazing what a genuine, "I'm truly sorry" can do.
On the other hand, I do think that some things in life are--for me--inexcusable and unforgivable. I'm not saying being vindictive, and i'm not saying being bitter about things is ever a good thing...but i don't think that you have to forgive to avoid either of those mental states.
do people define forgiveness differently? and I don't know many who agree with my assessment on the necessity of "forgiveness" lol
like this quote on forgiveness::
"Is forgiveness love? What is implied in forgiveness? You insult me and I resent it, remember it; then, either through compulsion or through repentance, I say, "I forgive you." First I retain and then I reject. Which means what? I am still the central figure; it is I who am forgiving somebody. As long as there is the attitude of forgiving it is I who am important, not the man who is supposed to have insulted me. So when I accumulate resentment and then deny that resentment, which you call forgiveness, it is not love. A man who loves obviously has no enmity and to all these things he is indifferent. Sympathy, forgiveness, the relationship of possessiveness, jealousy and fear—all these things are not love. They are all of the mind, are they not?"
too late to edit my last post so i will give the origin of the quote here::
j krishnamurti
atb....