I wasn't always this way! Just things keep going wrong despite the fact we do things right iykwim! i get jealous easily and compare too much. For example even though i'm a youngish mum I do my best for my children, i believe in attachment parenting and make sure my children eat good food, breastfeed etc Yet i feel that the mums who don't seem to care, who can't wait to go to the pub after giving birth and smoke over their children are the ones who get all the luck! Great weddings, no money worried etc I know i'm being silly. Dp works all the time and then some yet we are struggling. I hardly see him. Now our wedding in september has just been ruined as the reception cancelled on us and we can't afford anywhere else. There's one other problem i can't forget something. 4 years ago on my birthday i was expecting a proposal, together 2 years, a little boy etc and he said in the pub when asked if my present (a ring) was an engagement one. He said "urgh god no!" and i lost that thing inside. you know the one where you know you are with that perfect person. I didn't tell him for ages. by then i'd got angry at him and he at me. Now it turns out he meant no he'd get me a better ring! but i can't get back the feeling from before and i can't forget. I'm also ill with colitis and need to give up my only pleasure in life - food!. How do i get happy and positive?
RE: Angry, stressed and negative
Hi moogyboobles
First off, I'm sorry to hear that you seem to be having a tough time of it at the moment and that you are feeling angry, stressed and negative, all of which are perfectly understandable.
However, the Life Coaching forum is where we discuss and share ways of taking action to move forward with our lives, so you are very welcome here. 🙂
Strictly speaking, coaches do not give "advice", since all action is client-generated with support from the coach, but I wonder from a brief read of your posts elsewhere on HP if you have considered talking to a nutritionist. I had a healing crisis a year or so ago, caused by years of "preventative medicine" ;), and with a combination of a very strict diet (no wheat, dairy, yeast or sugar - boring!) and supplements, I was greatly helped and was later able to gradually return to the forbidden foods.
I'm a great believer in the mind/body/spirit connection, so I feel that getting your physical health right could be a good starting point. Secondly, once you feel better in yourself, you may find that some of the negative feelings will go away by themselves, and your confidence will be restored and you will begin to feel more positive again.
I would also like to suggest, if you have not already done so, that you have a good read of the various threads in this forum, you may find that something just clicks for you and could be the next step.
In beginning to take a look at a client's life, future and challenges I always prefer to begin with the positive, rather than a "what's wrong", though that is not intended as dismissive. So perhaps you might like to make a list of all the good things in your life, everything that you DO have - and please post here just as much or as little as you wish on that.
Talk to you again soon, and I can only repeat that I am sure you will find lots of support and encouragement in this forum, even though responses will be as different and varied as are the unique individuals making them.
Best wishes,
Holistic
RE: Angry, stressed and negative
Hiya Moogyboogles,
Its a vicious cycle of negativity, and once you are stuck in it, it is so hard to get out of! but you can do it, I know, I did it!
You will need help, and lots of courage but it can be done.
I am not a therapist, or a life coach or anything like that, but I can share my story with you and it might just help.
I was diagnosed with depression in January, like you I had lost that inner security, that feeling that that you are fine. I was in debt, extreamly unhappy, thought I was a rubbish mum, and generally worthless. It got to the point where I just wasnt functioning, like I was on auto pilolet, the childern were fed, had clean clothes, went to nursery ect, but there was nothing but that. I went to the Drs because I knew life was about more than this. He gave me antidepressants and put me on the counselling list. So like a good little zombie I did as I was told! I discovered HP and started to type about all my worries and fears, and little by little I started to take small steps away from negativity. I started counselling and that was a great starting point, along with the practicle help (for debts) and the love and support I found on HP I manged to break the cycle of negativity. I began to see blue skys where they were once black. I learnt to deal with one problem at a time, and concentrate on it untill I had solved it, then I moved to the next. Its been hard going, and I still havnt got the "happy ever after" not sure that I ever will, but what I have got I am learning to really appreciate it. Two wonderfully loving polite and well rounded children, an amazingly supportive partner, friends, love and laughter. In your darkest hour you cannot see all this, all you need is to ask someone to turn on the light.
Take from my story what you will, and I hope you will keep posting on HP, its a good place to ask "where is the light switch?"
RE: Angry, stressed and negative
thank you so much for the replies!
I had 2 horrid days (more things gone wrong) but just had some reiki for the 1st time and am quite amazed, i do feel better already and i could really feel it! Couldn't believe the lady knew what i was thinking and feeling. What she told me correlates alot, my solar plexus was all unbalanced just looked it up and that does link to digestion and anger! got a spiky aura too! she said she can help me look at things a bit more positively! i do hope so!
Tracy
xx
RE: Angry, stressed and negative
Hi moogy,
Glad to hear that the Reiki went well for you and that you are already feeling better as a result of your treatment. It really is amazing and works at all levels.
One to put at the top of your "positives list" perhaps! 🙂
I wonder where you looked up about solar plexus etc. Was it Louise Hay's You Can Heal Your Life? I use that book all the time, especially the chart at the back that relates physical symptoms and body parts to the emotions. Usefull not just for Reiki, but also Life Coaching ... a client with lower back pain might have underlying money worries, for instance.
You take care of yourself, and have a good weekend.
Holistic
RE: Angry, stressed and negative
thank you. i did feel better, but have had an upset evening but she did say that might happen when i let things go a bit! suppose i feel a bit better for it now! I don't ahve any books on reiki (i might get some from library though as ia mareally interested now), i'm new to it! just googled solar plexus and all the things an unbalanced one can lead to has in me!
Tracy
xx
RE: Angry, stressed and negative
Hi Tracy
I was pleased to read that you obviously found a wise and knowledgeable Reiki practitioner (is she a Reiki master?) who told you that you might expect some slight after effects from the treatment. This is quite normal and all part of the healing process, you could call it a bit of a clear out. I expect she also told you to take it easy and drink plenty of water, which will help to flush out toxins - again at all levels.
Take care, and we can talk some more next week.
Holistic
RE: Angry, stressed and negative
yep! she told me a few times to drink lots of water!