What is the best way of achieving and sustaining a good erection? I can achieve one but can't hold it for long at all. I am not interested in pills.
Cheers
A beautiful woman helps........hehe
Thats what I thought too Oakapple, but didnt like to say so!
:rollaugh:
Good porn?
Imagination?
Delaying things by using foreplay?
Intimacy beyond just sex? There is something special about sharing that moment with someone you love rather than plain old sex.
It may be an age related thing (but generally not for those under 50) so ask your GP to refer you to a sex therapist. You may not like the advice given, but it can work. Such as - avoid penetrative sex for a while, but enjoy 'the moment' and explore the body of the person you are with - avoiding the genitals. (Like DFTP above says - intimacy!) The therapist may recommend this regime for a few days/weeks - he/she may also refer you for further investigations if a physical reason is causing the lack of erectile function.
What is the best way of achieving and sustaining a good erection? I can achieve one but can't hold it for long at all. I am not interested in pills.
Cheers
Stop worrying about it.
Stop worrying about it.
This is so true but also difficult to do unless you know how.
I would recommend Mantak Chia's book The Multi Orgasmic Man
I am interested what do you say to yourself (in your head) when you have achieved an erection?
I am interested what do you say to yourself (in your head) when you have achieved an erection?
"Good Boy!, now stand up straight!"... "shoulders back!...well done lad" (and sometimes I affectionately pat him a little, you know...in a kinda fatherly way);)
"Good Boy!, now stand up straight!"... "shoulders back!...well done lad" (and sometimes I affectionately pat him a little, you know...in a kinda fatherly way);)
:005:
Seriously though Steve please answer it does make a difference and may give me a clue towards offering some advice on a resolution to your problem..
If you do an HP search on Erectile Dysfunction you will find quite a lot of ideas.
I wrote before about improving pelvic floor health and sexual function: you will increase the blood flow around the area by practicing pelvic floor muscle contractions. You do this by drawing up the back passage muscles as if stopping breaking wind, and lifting the genitals upwards with a gentle but strong internal telescopic pull.
Inwards and Upwards!
Hope you find something to help you,
Sharon.
If you do an HP search on Erectile Dysfunction you will find quite a lot of ideas.
I wrote before about improving pelvic floor health and sexual function: you will increase the blood flow around the area by practicing pelvic floor muscle contractions. You do this by drawing up the back passage muscles as if stopping breaking wind, and lifting the genitals upwards with a gentle but strong internal telescopic pull.
Inwards and Upwards!
Hope you find something to help you,
Sharon.
This really works well and all of this information and more is in Mantak Chia's book The Multi Orgasmic Man... see link to amazon and book further down the thread....
Oh, it looks really good Jason! I daren't buy it, If I left it lying around the house, I wouldn't have anytime left to spend on HP!
:rollaugh:
I have read a book by that guy. It did go on a bit about pulling up the rear, front, left and right of the anus at different points.
:005:
Seriously though Steve please answer it does make a difference and may give me a clue towards offering some advice on a resolution to your problem..
I am not sure what I think about, I have never really thought about it. I have been trying to focus on other things and it's working slightly but I can't hold one thats properly solid for long. Is there a herb I can get at the supermarket that will help or a food I can pickup locally?
Cheers
the reason I asked is if you are thinking about loosing your erection that is exactly what happens... its called a post hypnotic sugestion... so I would suggest that you think about what you want to achieve ans state them in a positive way...
Also I would recommend Mantak Chia's book The Multi Orgasmic Man
and his book on cultivating male sexual energy
Here is also a link to healing Tao in the UK:
I know I am repeating myself but I cannot stress how much this has benefitted me and a number of my clients (and their partners!!)
Thanks for those links, very interesting read.
Is there nothing I can pickup at the local supermarket that will help?
Cheers
Tried stuff earlier tonight with my girlfriend and I could only get a semi which still worked but it wasn't as good as possible and it was a tiny bit embarassing. I could get up ok at first then when it came to doing stuff I just lost it and couldn't get it up.
Surely there is something I can pick up at the local supermarket?
Cheers
I don't think there is anything you could by from the supermarket, and i personally think your 'problem' is more psychological than medical. It seems like you are trapped in a vicious circle, i would suggest relaxation techniques plus 'going back to basics', this meaning you have a little break regarding sexual contact so the pressure is off as i feel you may be trying too hard( pardon the pun!;)).
Warmest wishes- calla lily x
Thanks for the fast reply. This was my first sexual encounter so I`m not sure about the break thing. It's like I think about things too much then nothing works but I try to think about other things but it's not working. It's really getting me down :(.
Awww, Steve1, have a hug.:hug: Its perfectly normal to young men such as yourself to get stressed out over 'performance', especially as its your first experience where i assume you feel pressured to satisfy your girlfriend, and when things don't go to plan, anxiety develops which affects arousal.
Have you spoken to your girlfriend about your worries? Perhaps you could both plan some activities that don't predictably lead onto sex, such as going to the cinema, pub etc. You may find that this takes the pressure off you, and once you start relaxing, you should see an improvement in sustaining erections.:)
Warmest wishes- calla lily x
This was my first sexual encounter so I`m not sure about the break thing. It's like I think about things too much then nothing works but I try to think about other things but it's not working.
Steve,
You say this is your first sexual encounter so that would (in most cases nowadays) imply that you are still very young, as perhaps is your girlfriend.
It's very common for someone young, experiencing sexual situations for the first time to experience nerves and other mixed emotions and this could most certainly be a cause for the condition you describe.
Over time, and with an understanding partner, you will obviously gain in confidence and these issues are likely to dissappear.
Don't feel pressurised to get it right straight away as there is no right or wrong. All the stories you hear from others about how great their first sexual experience was is just a load of rubbish, they're just blowing their own trumpet cos they don't want to admit that they were just as nervous and probably fumbled around getting embarrassed too.
If you are young like you have implied, then please be sure that you are happy in your relationship with your girlfriend before you plunge into the depths of sex. You don't need to have sex straight away to make a relationship. Even when we reach the legal age of 16 for having sex, we may think we are mature enough, but it's when we get older still that we realise how inexperienced in life we are (I remember being in my 20's looking back and thinking, "Blimey, I really didn't know what I do now". It's better to wait until the time is right, use the necessary precautions and be legal and safe. 😉
Love and Reiki Hugs
Do you guys think that 'Horny goat weed' would help? If so I have a few questions about it:
1. The tub in Holland and Barrett says 'Take 2 capsules twice daily'. Does this mean I take it everyday OR I take it twice a day on the day I feel I will require it?
2. How long does it take for the effect to kick in?
3. Does it help me achieve and sustain a good, hard erection?
4. How long will it last for?
Thank you for the help everyone 🙂
Oh dear steve, I dont think the horny goat weed will help.
I think you want a fast simple answer that alas dosen't exist.
It is all about learning to r-e-l-a-x and (oh so easy to say...) stop worrying.
Maybe you and your girl friend can look at something exciting together before hand
or try this
This site describes how you give each other a lovely massage which is very exciting but with out the emphasis actually being on you 'performing' (poor you, how stressful i always feel sorry for men have to 'perform') do try it, I think it might work...
blessings x
I have good and bad news.
Good: I was a bit harder last night than when we did stuff before but still not properly up with the ability to sustain.
Bad: I don't think horny goat weed gives harder or longer lasting erections, it just makes the orgasm better.
I feel relaxed, what am I worrying about?
I feel relaxed, what am I worrying about?
I think only you know the answer to that!
Hello Steve,
I wonder whether you may find arginine which is an amino acid, helpful. It helps blood vessels go about their daily work and helps blood flow. As a supplement it is used to help tackle erectile problems.
To maintain an erection the nerve endings in the penis need to produce nitric acid, which in turn helps blood flow into the penis, which causes the erection. Arginine is one of the substances that creates nitric acid as soon as it it introduced into the system.
Personally, if I were a man, I would make sure my zinc levels were not low, as zinc is associated with all the sexual functions. The two together, arginine and zinc may do the trick!!
Candlelight 🙂 xx
Can I take multivitamins containing zinc to boost my zinc levels or do I need just a zinc supplement?
Hi Steve,
It is so dependent on your dietary history. Zinc is a very sensitive mineral and not easily absorbed. What can hinder absorption is candida, the phytic acid in the soya bean, the phytic acid in wheat, dairy products, probably other factors. Alcohol and tobacco deplete zinc. Vegetarians and anorexics are very deficient in zinc.
Men are more likely to be deficient than women in zinc, and it is contributory to low sex drive.
You may have gathered , I hate to prescribe any supplement without knowing a person's history, but as a general rule an adult would need 36mg. of zinc per day and ideally zinc citrate. However, having said that, you may need an awful lot more, I just don't know. A multi-vitamin/mineral supplement would not provide this.
The arginine may also be something to investigate though!
Candlelight 🙂 X
Hi Steve
Candlelight's advice is sound, Arginine is a safe and natural alternative to Viagra and if you also take his advice about the zinc you may find that with regular supplementation it makes a difference.
One thing to consider with Arginine is that it may also increase sperm count and potency in both men and women so take care and play safe (I'm sure you already do)
arginine doesn't apear to be working...
Will need to try out the zinc I guess.