Help if you could?

RE: Help if you could?

Hi girl in the corner,

I'm sorry to hear about your Mothers illnesses and you must be so young yourself. I wish that I lived closer so that I could help you, but there are many things that both you and your Mother could do to help yourselves. Can I ask you a question? Do you believe in a God, Divine Spirit, whatever you would like to call this energy? I am not religious by the way, but am a spiritual healer. You could give your Mother healing every day yourself. Just by laying your hands on her shoulders and asking Spirit to use you as a healing channel, the energy will flow through you into her. If you felt nervous about this, find a Reiki teacher and get attuned to give healing, it only takes a day or two at the most and will change your life -and better still your Mums.

Also simple things like drinking water instead of tea or coffee to allow the body to get rid of waste, and simple food like fruit and vegetables and saladsto give vitality. Try to go on a wheat free diet as so many of us - unknowingly - have wheat intollerence. It's actually very easy to do, especially if you have a proper cooked meal every day and breakfast (most important). Just try it for one week and see the difference it makes - believe me it is dramatic!

If your Mum wants help with depression then PM me and I will do my best to support you :).

Love and best wishes
Publisher [sm=wave.gif]

RE: Help if you could?

Thankyou for your reply. We are willing to try anything so I appreciate your suggestion and will definately look into it and see if I can get her to see someone locally for it. She has been through all the intolerance testing and nothing has shown up and due to her stomach illness she is unable to eat full meals without being seriously ill after.

I am only 20 and when I try to explain the situation to people they tend not to take me seriously either which does not help. I am not expecting a cure but something to alleviate her pain would hopefully restore a bit of faith in her that she can deal with this and she is not suffering alone.

Again thanks for your help.

RE: Help if you could?

Hi girl in the corner,

I'm really sorry to hear about your mum. You both must be finding it really hard to cope at the moment.
Have you thought about trying any complementary therapies to help her condition? I am a reflexologist and i know that it can help considerablywith ME/CFS. There are also many other therapies which may help i.e. reiki, homeopathy, aromatherapy, acupuncture.

Don't feel that you have no where to turn simply because the doctors don't seem interested! There are many other ways in which your mother can be helped.

Feel free to PM me if you need to chat.

Take care
Kate:)

RE: Help if you could?

Thanks so much. I can't believe how helpful people can be!

I am definately going to look into alternative methods but my only worry is that it will make matters worse if it is not right for her. I know it's all trial and error to discover what's right for the individual but I'd hate for it to set her back or anything.

Is there a way to know if reflexologists or reiki therapists are registered and properly qualified? Just to make sure she's seiing the best person for it?

Also, thanks for the offer of talking. It is hard when you don't have anyone to talk to and when friends just seem to think it will go away because they don't understand it.

I appreciate this so much.

RE: Help if you could?

Please try not to worry too much......you are not alone. I myself have felt the same as you do in the past. You feel like you have no where to turn and that no body is really interested in what is worring you. Please don't feel this way. You can always log into HP and talk through what's troubling you with people who almost always understand.

Most therapies won't set your mother back in any way. They can only help matters. So, don't be afraid to ask her to try them. You can find a registered reflexologist by visiting [link= http://www.findareflexologist.co.uk ]www.findareflexologist.co.uk[/link] or [link= http://www.associationofreflexologists.co.uk ]www.associationofreflexologists.co.uk[/link]
All of the reflexologists listed on these sites are registered with a regulating body of some kind.

I don't know much about other therapies but i'm sure the freindly people here at HP will be able to help you if you are interested, as everyone here has different specialities.

If you want you can PM me your details and i can help you find a registered reflexologist in your area.

Hope this helps

Luv Kate[sm=FIFangel.gif]

RE: Help if you could?

Hi Girl in the corner,

I agree with others here, please don't feel alone there is plenty of help and I am sure that some kind of therapy can help your Mum. My friend was diagnosed with ME/Chronic fatigue and luckily had a helpful doctor, she has also seen a specialist recently to confirm the diagnosis. My friend has been off work for several months but is steadily improving. She has been visiting an acupuncturist and a reflexologist on a regular basis and is sure that this has helped her recover quicker.

I know that she has mentioned discussion forums specifically for ME that have given her support, perhaps they would be of help. I found one just by doing a quick search: [link= http://www.supportme.co.uk ]www.supportme.co.uk[/link]

Finally, I think that nutritition could be very important here. You could research on the web/in books for foods to help these conditions or even better if you have the money try getting your Mum to a Kinesiologist or Nutritional Therapist.

Keep posting here as there are lots of people listening!

Take care

Juniper

RE: Help if you could?

hi

I suffered from ME for several years so know how difficult it can be for both everyone involved. My experience was that the medical profession were not much help and had little to offer. However, there is light at the end of the tunnel so please do not despair! As someone else said there are a number of support groups and you may find one near you. I found that acupuncture helped and I then went on to have regular reflexology session (and am now a reflexologist myself!). Different treatments work for different people so it is worth trying a few. I feel the most important thing is to LISTEN TO YOUR BODY..... don't push yourself and rest when you can. You need to manage your energy - so if for instance you know that you have a task or event coming up that will take lots of energy then make sure you get lots of rest the day before. Also try to stay positive (and this is where you can really help your mum) ME can make you feel really useless and helpless - I overcame this by setting myself really small targets each day so that I felt that I had acheived something and made progress.

Although ME is a physical illness there are some theories that say it is linked with the emotional state and can be due to a person not being true to themselves and going in a direction that is not what they really want. It may be worth thinking about this aspect too.

You need to look after yourself as well as the pressure of caring with someone with ME can be dificult sometimes.

I hope this helps. Your mum will get better in time. Although ME was difficult for me I can look back and see that many positive things came out of it too so don't give up hope!

Take care

LLamagirl

RE: Help if you could?

Girl in the corner

Try this link for ME support groups in Manchester

[link= http://www.meassociation.org.uk/ukloccon.htm#gmcr ]http://www.meassociation.org.uk/ukloccon.htm#gmcr[/link]

llamagirl

RE: Help if you could?

Thanks for the replies. It kind of feels like a little bit of the weights off of me now I have somewhere to come and talk to people who understand and help.

Just had word with my Mum about the suggestions but she is so cynical of these treatments. Part of it is down to her feeling so low that she feels nothing will work and part is due to our Doctor consistently warning about the effects of these treatments (i.e. can do more harm than good). I just personally think after 15-20 years of her body being fed with medicine after medicine she needs to look wider at another range of therapy. I have tried to say, in the nicest way possible, that with this there is no medicine so she has no choice but she seems reluctant to give it a try.

I have persuaded her to make an appointment with a support group and we are going to that on Monday so I don't know how that will go, but I am trying to plead with her to just give it a go. I understand her worries that it may not work (as it is a cost we can't afford to throw away as she is not working) or aggravate her other illnesses but I need to make her realise that they will take this into account. I just want her to realise that there are ways of getting alleviance from the symptoms, but that you just need to be prepared to try. I think the only way I'm going to get through to her is if I go and have words with reflexologists and acupuncturists etc myself and see what they say (however, as I'm studying for my finals which are in a month finding time for this could be hard! But they do say if you want to make time for something then you will...)

Sorry if this was a bit rambly but it's good having this support. Thankyou from the bottom of my heart.

RE: Help if you could?

thanks llamagirl by the way, I am trying to take care of myself but not too successfully! As I say I am in my finals so that is stress enough but this thrown on top is alot! My Mum constantly gets upset at the thought of me feeling the burden of caring but I reassure her that I don't feel like that and that when I get angry or upset it is not because I am tired of her it is because I am frustrated at not being able to help. I know it's the daft lttle things I do for her that keep her going but it's instinct to want to cure it for her!

She does try to take it a day at a time, we even managed a spontaneous trip to the coffee shop at the bottom of our road the other day that we had to return home early from as she was exhausted but I had to reassure her this was a huge acheivement and that she should be pleased with herself and not push any further.

Thankyou.

RE: Help if you could?

I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. ME can be such a misunderstood condition andas you have already said it is difficult for some people see beyond the symptoms and consider what might be causing her to feel this way.

As an aromatherapist I have worked with a couple of people with ME and have had varied results. One young woman found that any form of massage caused huge dips in her energy and made her feel rotten for days, so this treatment wasn't for her. Another older lady found that massage helped her to relax and in return rewarded her with more energy, she felt great. Obviously aromatherapy isn't just about massage, you can also use the oils around the house and can be as easy as adding a blend to your bath.

You can PM me if you would like me to suggest some oils specific to your mum's needs.

Best wishes.

RE: Help if you could?

Hi girl in the corner,

Hope I'm not interfering, but how did the meeting at the support group go on Monday? There are lots of threads on this site, but many of your friends here - me being one of them - don't like some talks to go away, simply because we know that you have to deal with your Mum's issues every day and we want to know how 'you' are, as well as your Mum.

Love and best wishes
Publisher [sm=wave.gif]

RE: Help if you could?

HI Girl in the corner

If ti helps, I am happy to chat through some theories about illness etc so you and your mum can feel more comfortable and make more informed choices adding to the wonderful posts here - let me know if I can be of help 😉

RE: Help if you could?

Hi G in the C

Have you checked the Thread atop o this Forum?
[link= http://www.healthypages.net/forum/tm.asp?m=67802 ]http://www.healthypages.net/forum/tm.asp?m=67802[/link]

I wrote it a while back, but still hold with most of it. I've written various other nippets on HP over the years on the subject, which will pop up if you do a HP Forum Search with my user name as author. There's more revealing stuff about my history underthe Arthritis forum.

I have been thru the CFS/fibromyalgia thing myself, so have a fair idea of what you're going thru. Been thru all the psychobabble, seen a shed load of so called specialists & consultants, taken all manner of wondernutritional supplements - I won't go on.

In short NAET sorted me out & i've spent the last 4 years help sort others out with similar problems with a combination of osteopathy & NAET.

So you could say I'm dedicated to the subject and helping people with this problem, although those that know me would probably say obsessive. 😀

If you want any more specific info, then I'll need a bit more to go on and augt tosay that I don't visit HP as much as I used to.But will try & get back as soon as I can.

Andrew.

RE: Help if you could?

hi there girl in the corner,

i am new on the forum so please bear with me.

i wasdiagnosed with cfs in march and have had similar sceptical response from my gp, however was very lucky to have access to a local hospital consul ant who has been invaluable.

i am from the manchester area too and have been told i am out of area for services, but there is one at liverpool at the royal liverpool university hospital. i don't know if you could see if your mum could be referred. worth a try. it is led by dr f nye.

good luck, keep trying it is so very frustrating and difficult. you are doing really well, i wish you and your mum well.

take care,

kind regards,

dawnymarieX 🙂

RE: Help if you could?

Hi Girl in the corner, i am also sorry to hear about your mum, i know from experience what a debilitating illness M.E/CFS can be,i have had it for 6 1/2 yrs now, i have tried many things over the years, i was given anti depressants in the early stages, which actually made me feel worse! having a disorder like M.E can make you very sensitive to side effects, it may be worth checking what the side effects of any meds she is taking are, these may not be helping her situation, (i am not suggesting that she come off them by herself )

i have tried chinese herbal medicine, about 9 yrs ago i had a bout of mild M.E and the chinese herbal meds worked to purge my system, however i tried them again this time about 4 rs ago but they made me feel much worse, i also had acupuncture which i did not feel much relief from, but it did help my headaches (i get them constantly)
i have had pranic healing which works on the energies a bit like reiki, you feel a little worse for a few days then a little better,
i think reiki would probably work in a similar way.

i do think it is worth trying any kind of help,everyone with this condition responds in a different way to things it is really trial and error i think.
has your mum been checked for her vitamin/mineral balance, since getting M.e i can no longer hold onto iron or vit b12 (but i also have pernicious anaemia) it may be worth getting them checked as both these can make you extra fatigued if they are depleted.

i aso think that you should get a second opinion with a doctor who knows more about fatigue,it is unfortunate to say that you now have to fight with your doctor for help,i had a great doc,then he left,and i am struggling to find someone,but i fought for the b12 and to see a gastro specialist,next on my list is a fatigue specialist, just keep on fighting,researching,tell your mum never to give up, i feel worse now than i did in the begining,i am also trying to be a mother to a 4 yr old, i fight my body every second of the day, but i will not give up, or give into this, there is support online,like this forum,if she cannot get out.

lastly,i also agree with the earlier post about food intolerance (there are few reliable methods of testing,omitting from the diet trial and error probably best, wheat and yeast are main culprits)and emotional state, before i got my disorder i was the one person to help everyone else i always put others before myself,and other members of my family gave me a great deal os stress, i know that this left me depleted and vunerable to illness, please look after yourself as you are no good to your mum if you become ill too!
please take care of yourself
keep us posted as to you and your mums situation,
julia