Giving up completely?

RE: Giving up completely?

Dear Azalia, for some people drink is a like a poison for some people.

I ask, because I know that for some people consuming something that has alcohol in it, like a Tiramisu dessert, sets them off and compels them to have a drinking binge.

In this case it is a poison and the only way is zero contact with alcohol.

AA can help.

Divine Love

RE: Giving up completely?

For me I have to give up completely. Very sad,but there is definitely an alcho genein the family - both sides! Generally I only find it easy to resist if there's none available!
I think "I can resist everything except temptation" sort of sums it up........It just tastes so nice.

RE: Giving up completely?

Im a drug and alcohol worker, what I will say is people are individuals and what might work for one person wont for another.
There is something called natural recovery where people who were termed alcoholic were able to return to a so called normal pattern of drinking.
It is not true to say that everyone who drinks too much need give up alcohol forever. In my experience there is almost always a trigger, that is a reason as to why people engage in addictive behaviour.
Some people find that AA works for them, others are able to moderate their drinking after some counselling and some mature out of addictive behaviour as life circumstances change.

Pauline

RE: Giving up completely?

Thanks for your replies.

Sharon, if you don't mind me asking-and please don't feel obliged to answer- have you managed to stop drinking completely?

Ihaven't drunk alcohol for two years nowand haven't missed it one bit because I realised that I didn't ever like alcohol in the first place and the only reason I was drinking it was because it was social occasion and everyone was into getting stoned/drunk. Hehe, bear in mind I was only 15-16 at the time:D

RE: Giving up completely?

HI Az - no I don't mind you asking.

Yes I have for weeks or months at a time - and then someone brings a bottle of wine around, and that's it. I don't binge drink though. Just regularly, a little too much. Ideally I'd be able to stop at one glass, but if it's there I have to have three.

I ask people if they come around to takeany surplus bottles back with them - and I resist buying bottles in the supermarket and I manage it like that I'm not comfortable with it. I can't take it or leave it. It's an issue.

RE: Giving up completely?

hey Azalia I think that they should try to cut down bit by bit my moms cousin was a heavy drinker and a few months ago got so drunk he fell over and killed himself so its really important to get them to cut down and idealy stop
blessed be
lozz

RE: Giving up completely?

I'm an "all or nothing" kind of person in general... is that addictive? If I smoke -- I smoke tons. or I don't. Same with things like chocolate. I just can't seem to eat a bite or two and then go for months with none. If I eat any it seems like I'll need it every night. 'sigh. so I am not eating any at all [&o]

Now drinking I can have a glass or two of wine, or I can have a bottle over 5-6 hours in a night -- it depends on if I'm having "fun". If I am I sure don't want to stop. Right now I'm trying to be healthy, so I'm not having any at all. I think the sulfates in wine give me a headache so thought I'd cut it out to see if I felt better... beer has wheat so that's out and I can't tolerate hard liquor[:'(]. So I figure I don't really like to drink.

I don't really know. But I do know I could never just have one ciggy a day or something like that. It's all or nothing for me!

RE: Giving up completely?

Again, thanks for all your comments. I guess there's straight answer to this one since everyone overdoes it under slightly different circumstances and slightly different reasons.

Sharon- you'rea bit like me, though my vice is evilest yet mostdelicious substance known to woman:chocolate! I have 'given up' before and then a well meaning relative brings round a box of choccies or something and I can leave it for about two days until it all becomes too much and I have to dive in. Problem is, it doesn't stop at that box[&o]

AW- building on what I've written above, you're a LOT like me then! I am also a total 'all or nothing' person which goes for just about every area of my life. I'm either super organised (though this is RARE!) or totally unorganised. Scrupulously tidy or everything's a complete tip. Zero chocolate, or an embarrassingly large amount,so on and so forth.Hmmm. Still no closer to answering my own question yet, but it's useful to hear what everyone else thinks about this one.

RE: Giving up completely?

Hi Azalia

From experience, my advice would be giving up completely. I have had various addictions in the past, alcohol being one of them. I tried many times with all my addictions to control and minimise my contact with the various substances, I found it never worked. The person with addictive behaviour patterns will try anything to keep the substance / addiction in their life, no matter how small the amounts, as long as they still have some contact.

In my experience, healing can only truly begin when all contact with sunstance has stopped. I now work with people with substance misuse peoblems and have found this to be very much the case in my work too.

Donna.

RE: Giving up completely?

Thanks Donna,

What you say does makes sense.

person with addictive behaviour patterns will try anything to keep the substance / addiction in their life, no matter how small the amounts, as long as they still have some contact.

That's true, and I think having small amounts often ends up triggering the behaviour off again, because it's the all-or-nothing mentality. Or to be more specific- "I've started now, might as well completely finish myself off!"

Do you mind telling me how long it took you to give up your addictions? It's a very tough thing to do, and sometimes seems impossible and hard to believe you can ever do it! Well done.

RE: Giving up completely?

It's hard to guess how long it took because I have had so many over the years and not all at the same time so I don't really know how to measure that.

You are right though, just a little bit of a substance you are addicted to will set you off again. It may not be immediately obvious, the seed could be planted and a few weeks later you may find yourself back in your old patterns.

For me it was a long hard process, but totally and completely worthwhile and the best thing I could ever have done for myself as I was completely at my wits end and didn't know what to do or where to turn. I did it by myself, without any help or advice from anyone else and I'm glad I did because I don't think any other way would have worked with me.
I would say the hardest thing about giving up addictive substances is the lifestyle changes. The giving up bit is easy compared to that. For example someone with an alcohol problem who gives up will often find themselves home alone without their friends and will find that they have nothing to do, feel bored (and boring) and lonely. This is why so many people just end up going back to their old and familiar ways. They think, well at least I used to have fun and have a laugh before, now life's just boring. It's a very easy trap to fall into unless you are very very determined to change.